Don’t

If I wanted to put a goldfish in my pants, I’m over 18 and can buy them from any Petsmart.

I hate oral.

Wow, the perfect woman, loves sucking dick, but hates oral.

I just don’t think oral is worth any ounce of anxiety it causes me.

Society has always treated sucking dick like a must, and giving oral like a treat. As if it’s such an inconvenience. I don’t want dudes doing me any fucking favors. I don’t need special treatment to cum, and I hate silly nonsense.

I understand other women love oral, and more power to them. I love the powerful aesthetic of smothering a man in feminine energy, that all sounds super dope. But the actual sensations are not worth putting myself at the mercy of a man like that.

Despite having such a loud sexuality, and being more comfortable than most, I’m still insecure about aspects of myself, of my body, of even my sexuality. This is my biggest one.

If a dude commented on any sort of smell, or strange texture, or anything, i would be devastated.

I wash myself thoroughly and constantly because I’m so afraid to own an offensive odor. Even if my intimate odor isn’t offensive, I’m still insecure it exists. The idea of someone feeling the need to bring my smell to my attention, horrifies me.

I will run around throwing condoms to the wind and screaming “Get ‘cha dick out!” But I will not let men put their face in my intimate space.

I wish I hadn’t grown up in a culture so against this reciprocation. The culture surrounding oral gives men such an option to be loudly in the opposition. “That’s so gross.” “I’m never doing that.” “How can she expect me to do that?”

But sucking dick is the cover of Normal magazine.

I love sucking dick, but I’m also not a germaphobe. A typical guys hygiene schedule? I’m aware dudes love to smell themselves. I still suck dick, and I’m still more insecure about my own hygiene.

I remember how ridiculously bad my first boyfriend’s dick tasted. I would blow him side by side with a lollipop.

Looking back, this was a terrible practice that could have caused infections as well as actual ants in his pants.

I don’t care how unsanitary oral is, bring on the germs, I want my immune system to be as inflated as the American Military Complex.

That being said, I don’t blow hookups. I don’t felicitate anybody I couldn’t see putting my health over the wants and needs of their own dick.

Condoms. Condoms can keep you safe from  STIs and other nasty shit, but they taste bad no matter what. Latex tastes horrible, and he can’t really feel it through the condom. So I don’t see a point in blowjobs with condoms. So I don’t blow anyone I can’t trust to be clean and tested.

The risks of oral sex include:

• Syphilis
  • A Bacterial infection. Because genitals and mouths are full of fucking bacteria.
• Gonorrhea
  • Known as “The Clap”. It’s a bacterial infection that can infect the cervix, womb and the throat. Even your eyes. (Don’t put dicks in your eyes)
• Herpes
  • Herpes is a virus that causes breakouts of sores on infected areas.
• Chlamydia
  • A super catchy bacterial infection that mostly just causes strange bleeding.
• HIV
  • The Aids virus can be spread through oral. But not through the mouth. The mouth receiving penetration is the only one at risk. HIV can not spread through saliva, only genital fluids or blood. You can’t give HIV through oral, but you can get it.
• Hepatitis
  • A virus-caused liver infection.
• Warts
  • Genital warts. You can get them removed, but it’s nice not to get them in the first place.

I really like to lay out the risks of all sexual behavior because what I’m doing is not safe. When you hook up with strangers, your putting yourself at risk. Even with condoms. Which is why I don’t blow anybody I don’t know really really well.

But this blog post was about receiving oral, not giving it.

I’m now going to explain the concept of Dental dams.

It’s like saran wrap, but it’s basically an over-the-pusy-condom. These should be used, but I’ve never ever heard of one being used. It’s the only safe way to practice oral sex on a woman. It’s the only way to be sure you’re not getting gonorrhea in your throat.

There are female condoms, but it’s different than a dental dam. The best way to get a dental dam, it to just cut a condom length wise, and place it over the woman parts.

Sex is only safe with a condom, and with people you know.

Receiving oral sex puts both the receiver and the giver at risk, and I just personally find the sensation super uncomfortable. I can barely tolerate kissing, I don’t want to be fucking licked anywhere else, thank you.

 

On a happy note, all the effort I’ve put into myself, into my life, has paid off as I’ve gotten into my classes for Spring ‘19 at CSULB. My move from the bay, my massive break up, my slut phase, every hour of work I put in, my 7 months have accumulated into my success. My only regret is that it does not mean anything is going to slow down, or get easier. It means things are going to get harder and more organised. Am I looking forward to the challenge? No.

Am I going to do all of the things anyway? Yes.